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Jun 09, 2020

All of us experience pain. It's a human emotion and most certainly an event you will experience. And. . .it stinks to experience it. Pain is experienced from certain circumstances and events that you CANNOT CONTROL. 


 Just this weekend I experienced a lot of pain. I cried much of the weekend because someone I love made choices that directly affected me because they are disconnected/numb. When people are disconnected/numb, they usually invite pain into your life because they are moving around saying things and doing things that hurt and they are oblivious to it. This is where false beliefs and distortions come into the picture. 


False beliefs/distortion can be chosen when I experience pain that I cannot control because false beliefs/distortion masquerade and appear to be a way to get out of pain, when in reality all they do is create additional pain, called optional pain. Since we as humans desire to avoid pain, it is easy to choose into distortions and false beliefs as an illusion to escape pain. The wise thing to do is to learn about pain and how to identify whether you are experiencing optional pain or inevitable pain so that you don't choose optional pain. If you are not willing to distinguish between the two sources of pain, you will most likely default into optional pain which is called distortions and false beliefs. 


False beliefs attack the very essence of you (your soul) and tell you “You are not enough.” A false belief is a deeply flawed and distorted conclusion you reached about yourself, often long ago about your worth, your value, and your needs.

Here are the 5 Core False Beliefs that exist in everyone even if you don't overtly hear them:

  • I am not enough
  • I am unlovable
  • I am unworthy
  • I am inadequate
  • My needs don't matter

False beliefs are distorted thoughts, however false beliefs are underneath the audible, obvious distorted thoughts that you oftentimes recognize that say things like: 



  1. I can't do this 
  2. This is not fair
  3. No one likes me
  4. I am stupid
  5. I am going to get it wrong
  6. This always happens to me
  7. No one will understand 
  8. They are better at this than I am
  9. I am less than . . .you
  10. I am not attractive 

SELF-ADULATION: These types of distorted thoughts are so obviously flamboyant and entrenched in arrogance inside of a person, however in actuality, this is the person's way of covering up how afraid they are and how much they believe that their false beliefs are really the Truth. They fear that they are not enough and are not lovable and therefore, they over compensate for themselves. I call it, "Peacocking" or acting like a "rooster" or "blow-fishing" being all puffed up with pride.

2.  Self-adulation sounds like:

  1. I can do what I want.
  2. I am better than you.
  3. I am entitled to. . .
  4. Don't tell me what to do.
  5. I don't have to follow the rules.
  6. You are wrong and I am right.
  7. I know better. 
  8. I am unique, special and different.
  9. I am perfect. 
  10. What's wrong with you? 


When you hear self-denigrating or self-adulating distorted thoughts, you KNOW false beliefs are under the surface driving them. False beliefs are the root system that is outside of your awareness that is supplying the LIES to the distorted thoughts. 

I invite you to learn about false beliefs and distortions and become acutely aware of how they show up in your life. By recognizing distortions/false beliefs you will quickly be able to stop them from animating inside of your mind and heart and choose Truth instead. 


Living in Truth creates peace, clarity and connection.


Enjoy listening to the following podcasts:

Episode- 10: Pain is our Teacher

Episode 11: R.A.I.S.E 

Episode 113: Invalidation